Drawers of memories and thoughts

Mind was blank... staring hard at the blog thinking what to type... Trying to recap what has happened the past 6 months.. Moving to a new company, meeting new colleagues in a new environment. Actually what is so tough about adapting, I guess I am that type who likes to be in a comfort-zone. I maybe sociable but at the end of the day I just wish to be alone drinking my bubble tea and lunching with me n myself.

I still having empty feelings about the past.. I dunno whats the next step or I what more can I do to make things stay. I guess everything/ppl comes n goes just like wind. Some ppl may feel that I am very lucky to be in a happy family, married and with a bunch of good frens. But did they ever know how I gone thru all the pain previously? How does it feels when u really love someone a lot and u have no choice but to let the person go? How does it feels when u tot u can rely on the person but somehow he left you with no words? How does it feels when you have to struggle with work n your own love life trying to stop the tears from running? How does it feels when everything seems so right became wrong? Life is a mystery... and imagine working until you have no choice but to leave is the same as you love until u have to break.. dats how I started to be more independent coz at the end of the day if ppl needs to leave, I shouldn't be feeling so terrible? Tired? Yes I am? but who knows.. In front of ppl, you have to keep on smiling like you are perfectly fine and be professional.

Nobody is able to turn back time even if we are able to turn back time, if it is meant to happen it will happen there is no escape.